"Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it." (Proverbs 22:6)
I use to hear this proverb all the time growing up in the small town of Gary, Indiana where the culture of the city during the 80's and 90's was a church going culture. Parents may not have followed the Ten Commandments, but when it came to parenting, train a child in the way he should go, was only second to the frequent saying "Spare the rod, spoil the child." (Proverbs 13:24)
As a high school teacher, there's so many habits that my teenagers already have in place. It is when they are young children that the parenting stage is so crucial. As a parent to a 5yr. old, I know first hand how important it is to build a solid foundation. However, with there being no perfect children on this earth, no perfect parents, and no perfect humans, does it make the claim from this old proverb false?
I honesty feel that one of the main problems that we all suffer as humans, as parents, and as people who interact and form relationships with others is the bogus concept that we are not suppose to make mistakes. Growing up in the church as a little child, the perspective that I walked away with each Sunday after service is that there was a set of rules, and I had to follow them. If I broke these set of rules, there will be dire consequences. These consequences included things like whoppings, verbal abuse, family and friends permanently rejecting me, and the possibility of death with eternal damnation in a lake of fire. I was terrified!
I would not recommend this type of upbringing to anyone. It is rooted in fear (False Evidence Appearing Real) and not in love. Instead, the best parenting is done when the parents live everything that they "preach." The "Do as I say not as I do" method of parenting is ineffective. When parents model the correct way to live, the children will ultimately do the same thing. This does not mean that the child will never make any mistakes, nor does this mean that the child will not lose its way. This may happen. There's no way anyone can guarantee that a person will not make a mistake because no one is perfect. However, we can ensure that as parents, if we put in the work while they are young, and build a foundation, if the child gets off course it will most certainly find its way back.
"Training a child is like installing a GPS in a car. There's still a chance they'll get lost, but they have been equipped to find their way home."-Shira Dillon
Click Here For More Quotes Like These!
Five Tips To Help You Train Your Child In The Way They Should Go!
1. Love- At the end of the day we live our life, we experience emotions, and we make our decisions based on love or fear. Teach your child how to live a life of love. "For there are these three thing that endure: Faith, Hope, and Love, but the greatest of these is Love." (1Corinth 13:13)
2. Forgiveness- For some people, forgiving others is a difficult thing to do. In life, we get hurt, people do us wrong, and cause an unimaginable amount of pain. Yet, when we choose the high road of forgiveness we live a better life than one who dwells in anger and bitterness. Forgiving others is more about you having a great life than it ever is about the person who once hurt you. Choosing to not forgive is like carrying a 500lb. man on your back. When you fall, he doesn't hit the ground the but you're left completely broken.
3. Gratitude- Being grateful keeps us focus on what we have and not on what we don't have. Often times when people become severely stressed, depressed, and disruptive its because their attention is on themselves and what they don't like about their life. Teaching a child how to be thankful is a skill that will make a remarkable difference in the quality of their life. "In every thing give thanks." (1 Thessalonians 5:18)
4. Morals- As parents it's our job to live a life with good morals. Webster Dictionary defines the word moral as expressing or teaching the concept of right or wrong behavior. In other words, set some standards, create some boundaries. In order to train a child in the way he should go, parents must make it clear what right behavior and wrong behavior is and influence our child to want to do what's right on their own.
5. Contribution- This tip teaches our children that we have a personal responsibility to positively impact the lives of others. Our time on this earth is not just for our entertainment purposes only. Each person needs to have an invested interest to contribute to the lives of others without expecting anything in return. A person who dedicates a portion in their life to help others is a person who is on their way to being someone whose life has made a dramatic impact on the earth.
In short, all five tips to train a child in the way he should go deals with teaching our children to take their attention off themselves and to put it on others. Extraordinary people are extra ordinary people whom have put aside the selfish, narcissistic behavior we have at birth, and has exchanged it for an unconditional, agape love that says I will treat people the way I want to be treated. "Love thy neighbor as yourself." (Mark 12:31)
For more effective parenting tips from Shira click here!
Shira Dillon is a high school teacher in South, Central Los Angeles. Shira has over 15 years experience working with teenagers and is an expert with helping them and their parents deal with teenage issues. Ms. Dillon is the author of the book Sex, Drugs, and Other Elephants: How To Deal With Teenage Issues that share true stories from the authors life, as well as true stories from teenagers and how they deal with their problems. For more information about the book go to www.heyiwantthatbook.blogspot.com For a consultation, email me at shiradillon@gmail.com
Follow me on Twitter @ShiraNicole
No comments:
Post a Comment