Is your child's school prepared for an Arapahoe HS, Sandy Hook, Columbine situation? Check out These Tips to Get Prepared!!!

One of the trainings this year for me and my fellow teachers before the start of the school year was an active shooter training led by the Los Angeles School Police.  In awake of Sandy Hook and several other school shootings, the police department made it a priority to educate teachers and other school personnel on what to do in such a dangerous situation.  If you are a parent like I am, you want to be able to rest assure that your child is safe while at school and away from your presence throughout the day.  While there is no way to guarantee safety, there are ways to make sure your child's school is prepared in case an active shooter is on campus.

1. Figure Out What’s Going On. Build Your Awareness.- 

The more a person knows about what’s going on, the better decisions the person will make.  Knowing the location of the active shooter is key in helping the child's school make a sound decision on what action to take next.

2. Find A Way To Survive.- Studies have shown that people who survived a life-threatening situation all had survival as their focus.  Instead of fearing being hurt, or thinking that you don’t want to die, change your thoughts into the positive and focus on Surviving. 

3. Be Well Trained For Emergencies.- Having occasional drills for the staff to know what to do in an active shooter situation, as strange as that may sound to a more "seasoned" population,  can help better impact everyone. Knowing where the exit and emergency doors are key?

4    4. Don’t Forget That You Can Leave The School.- In times pass, teachers were told that they must stay on campus at all times and cannot take kids off campus without parent permission. It was noted that teachers sometimes try to hide and protect their students in the classroom  in active shooter type situations and become“sitting ducks”. Now the police officers are spreading awareness that if one can, teachers may take the students off campus to a safe location.  Don’t wait for the active shooter to   “accidently” come across you. Leave.

5   5. If all fails, you may have to Fight Back. If you find yourself in the room with an active shooter, don’t be afraid to collectively Fight Back. Yes, I was surprise about this statement too, but police officers say that the victims almost always in a school setting out-number the shooter.  If the shooter is an “Active” shooter the officers advised coming together to throw books, charge the gunman, spread out, do whatever one need. In a case where it is inedible that someone is going to get hurt, fighting back  can possibly decreased the number of injuries.  (i.e. Think about the passengers on the flight to Pennsylvania during 911 when they collectively took down the terrorist.)

All and all, there is no way to guarantee safety if there is an active shooter at your child’s school. I know that everyday I teach my son to be a beacon of love as I hope that he will keep love surrounding him. Perfect love casts out fear.  However, since this isn’t a perfect world, and we cannot ever be completely safe, it is helpful to know what teachers, (like myself) are being taught to protect children. I teach in a high school in South Central, Los Angeles and I know if the day ever comes where there is an active shooter, I pray that my inner-spirit guides me to keep every single child safe. Ultimately, “When in doubt, trust your gut.”  Allow your gut, that infinite intelligence part of you to guide and protect you, your love ones, and your community in a state of emergency.

Shira Dillon is a high school teacher and author of Sex, Drugs, and Other Elephants: How To Deal With Teenage Issues.  A non-fiction book geared toward teenagers, teachers and parents about the honest reality of social issues that teenagers face and how to survive them. Order a book for yourself at amazon.com or purchase some for a gift.  

Click to order Sex, Drugs, and Other Elephants: How to Deal with Teenage Issues

The Answers You Seek May Be Right In Front Of You!

Have you ever had a question that you asked to God, the universe of just out loud and had the answer come to you soon after?

I believe that the best way to get a questioned answered is by asking yourself out loud!

Sure, it is not as fun or engaging as discussing it with a friend but to get clear directions try writing it down and/or asking out loud first.

When you let the universe know that you need an answer the Law of Attraction begins working to bring you that answer, and it is our RESPONSIBILITY to keep both eyes open so we can receive that answer.

For those of you who are seeking answers for stability and cooperation in your home, desire to have a better relationship with your children, or want to be a better parent then the answer you may seek is right in front of you.

Today, Monday, November 25, 2013 I am giving away a FREE E-Book that holds the answers to numerous parenting questions.

                                                                     Sex
                                                                    Drugs
                                                                    Abuse
                                                                    Health
                                                                    Death
                                                               and many more.
Click to get your FREE GIFT now!

Are you a parent or grandparent wanting to learn how to deal with teen issues?

                                Do you need help discussing sensitive issues?

Are you a teen who need answers but realize that there is no one around that understands you?

If you answered YES to any of these questions you need MY FREE GIFT!

If you know someone who would answer YES to any of these questions than you might be there answer! Give them this FREE Gift!

Simply click the link below to go to amazon.com and download the free ebook! It will be FREE today Monday, Nov. 25th and Tuesday Nov. 26th.

Do me a favor! Even if you are not planning to get your free gift can you share this blog with your friends! My book may very well contain the answer to their prayers and the solution to some of their needs. You will feel GREAT that you were the one that helped them. In return, your friend will be grateful!!! Lets improve a life and help people get the answers they need! <3 Shira Dillon

Clickk here for your FREE Ebook!

The answers you seek is just a click away. Click the link and get the answer you've been seeking!

Get Some Boundaries and Have Them Respected!!!

In Steve Harvey's book Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man, he tells his readers that it is crucial for women to set up boundaries/standards of what women will and will NOT take and to make that known to the pursuer in a dating relationship.

I agree that it is important for both parties in a romantic relationship to establish boundaries, but this  should not stop with a romantic relationship.

                                 We need boundaries in parent-child relationships!!!

              Sign up now for a FREE class that will teach you how to set boundaries!

-Boundaries are needed in a host of different relationships. Especially when the members of the relationship live in the same household such as parent-child relationships.

-Both the boundaries of the parent as well as the child (after a certain age) should be agreed upon and honored.

-Boundaries mark when a person feels comfortable or uncomfortable, safe or unsafe, loved or unloved.

-Relationships fail, even parent-child relationships, when boundaries are not honored.

If you have a child that is not respecting boundaries, then there are three things that must be in place to begin helping that child to honor the boundaries established for the household.

 1.  Parents show your children what it means to recognize and respect other's boundaries through your own personal example.  

Today's generation are not accepting the "do as I say, not as I do" cliche of the past.

2. Parents insist that your boundaries are respected as well. 

Do not fall in a permissive state and allow your children to disrespect the boundaries.

3. Be honest and admit your mistakes.  It takes a healthy self-esteem to admit you have violated another's boundaries and to apologize.

While Steve Harvey encourages his female readers to establish boundaries at the beginning of the relationship and to use these boundaries in determining when to exit the relationship, a parent-child relationship is one that we should never terminate.

If there are little to no boundaries in your household then GET SOME.

If the boundaries are not being respected then GET HELP.

Parenting Coaches and Consultants can easily help a family get back on tract by supporting the parent and helping the parent fix some of the normal issues that come with raising children.

It makes sense to get help from someone who is well studied and experienced in these matters with a proven track record.

I am a parenting coach and consultant and can help you set some boundaries in your household.

If you ready to move your family from struggle to cooperation then feel free to contact me for support i at shiradillon@gmail.com

There's a great Breakthrough out there for your family.

You just have to be willing to go get it.

Thank You for Reading!

Shira Dillon is a Certified Master Breakthrough Parenting Instructor and Consultant. Shira is a proud mother of her six year old son. She has counselled children and parents for over fifteen years as a school teacher with both the Los Angeles Unified School District as well as the Gary Community School Corp and is the author of Sex, Drugs, and Other Elephants:How To Deal With Teenage Issues.  To remain in touch with Shira and to learn about her free upcoming parenting class and book giveaway email her at shiradillon@gmail.com and like her FB page ParentsTeachersandTeens for free parenting tips.  

LOVE OR FEAR: WHAT GUIDES YOUR PARENTING?

It has been said that there are only two motivating forces in life.

These forces are Love and Fear. 

When we operate in love we are operating at our best self.

When we parent in love we are parenting at our best self.

In order for an adult to improve the situations in the home between parent and child one must honestly take time to look within and to evaluate their own parenting styles.

Are you parenting in a force of love or fear?

It is possible to operate in both love and fear but NOT at the same time.

Parents normally shift between love and fear based on the circumstances that are thrown their way.

When children do good things, the essence of a parent's being become flooded with love.

When children misbehave, a parent may engulf a spirit of fear that can result in raised voices, harsh words, and severe punishment in order to show the child the consequences of their poor behavior.

This is how many people have grown up for centuries.

We send out vibrations of love when things are going well and in turn spew out vibrations of fear, anger, and guilt when things are bad.

It's what we have been exposed to as the way to solve problems in the home and to make the child obey.

                                However, how do you feel when you are operating in fear?
                             
                                Find Out What Teenagers Are Saying by Clicking Here!

What emotions are you releasing on yourself, your children, and everyone in your path?

In heated situations, are you allowing love to guide your parenting or have your emotions shifted into fear?

                                  To Learn More Sign Up for A FREE Parenting Class

I want to breakdown 3 approaches to raising children.  Two of these approaches have been existing and in heavy practice since the beginning of time. But only one of these approaches keeps the parent and child in the force of love no matter the obstacle that the family may be dealing with.

                         Read the three types of parenting and determine which one are you?

1. Permissive Parenting- the children are allowed to unfold without the direction of their parents. It is assumed that the child will naturally make the right choices when ready. (i.e., Johnny, whenever you are ready to clean your room, I suppose you'll do it.  I'll just let you sit in a dirty room until you figure out you should clean it.)

2.  Authoritarian Parenting-  is the oldest and most widely-used approach. Parents take charge by using their power and authority to punish their children in order to teach them what to do. (i.e., Johnny, clean up this room now or there will be no television for a week! Do it NOW!)

3.  Breakthrough Parenting- the responsibility for solving problems is shared between parent and child. Parents teach by using discipline instead of punishment. Parents use influence instead of control. (i.e., Johnny, your room is a mess, what is your plan for cleaning this room? Tell me the best way for you to clean your room immediately?

When I first began studying Breakthrough Parenting, I couldn't say that I operated as a breakthrough parent. I was not raised by a breakthrough parent.  While I liked the shared responsibility between mother and child, I felt that "Clean your room now was just as effective." It wasn't until I began studying and talking to thousands of teens, young adults, and parents that I learned that there is always ways to improve on our parenting methods.

Children who feel that they are being controlled with anger, punishment, and loud outbursts eventually rebel and experience emotional consequences in their adult life.

While these methods may seem to work initially, the method is only temporary.

Oftentimes, when we instill fear in our children to get them to behave, it's equivalent to putting a band-aid on a festering sore.

We need to instill love in our children for long lasting results while teaching them how to become responsible members of society.

My goal for my own children and the 500 plus students I teach each year as a high school English and Theater Teacher is for every child to develop self-mastery.

Self-Mastery is the power to control one's actions, impulses, and emotions.

                                         Are you a self-mastered person?
                                Sign up for a FREE video class to lean more!

Breakthrough Parenting with love is a great way to learn self-mastery and to turn any parenting struggles into cooperation.

If anything you've read has sparked an interest, please feel free to email me at shiradillon@gmail.com
Email the word CLASS if you are interested in a FREE class to learn more about Breakthrough Parenting.

People spend countless number of dollars and time in education and training for their careers.

             How much time and training have you spent on the career of being a parent?

Join me for a free online video class about Breakthrough Parenting.

In it you will learn...

-Effective discipline in a way that promotes willing cooperation from your children
-How to communicate so that everyone listens and understands
-Resolve conflicts quickly and easily with win/win methods
- .......and much much more!

You can enroll in the online video class of Breakthrough Parenting w/ Shira by doing any of the following....

1. Email the word FREE to shiradillon@gmail.com
2. Follow Shira on facebook at https://www.facebook.com/Mz.ShiraNicole
3. Join Parents, Teachers and Teens page on FB at https://www.facebook.com/ParentsTeachersAndTeens?ref=hl

Thank you for reading this blog. Feel free to follow me on google+ or join my fan page at www.facebook.com/ParentsTeachersandTeens .

To become an even more involved parent in your child's life, and to better understand the teenagers of today purchase my new book Sex, Drugs, and Other Elephants: How to Deal with Teenage Issues by Clicking Here! Or by checking the book our on amazon. Order a hardcopy or download an e-book for your kindle today! Order Now!

After the Not-Guilty Verdict...Will Things Change or Will There Be More of the Same?

I have received several inboxes asking me my opinion concerning the verdict in the Trayvon Martin/Zimmerman Case. While I have my opinions, my mind is on a form of action.  What are we doing to be the CHANGE we want to see in this world? Actions truly speak louder than words, so while the news is fresh, I will read statuses of disappointment and awareness.  And as I search for a silver lining in this dark cloud I can honestly say I have learned beneficial things about African-American history; the names of young people who had been murdered and forgotten about before Trayvon Martin.  But as the weeks past, I urged people to take (constructive) action. Be a part of a solution! Life is not just about our small circle of friends. We must use our lives to benefit us all because injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.

I challenge all Americans that are disappointed (once again) in our judicial system, to NOT lay themselves on the mercy of the court. There is one thing that we have that no one can take away from us as long as we are breathing and that is our mind, which must be strengthen by an education.  We can do powerful things with our mind if we use it to focus on the right things. 

Here are a few things that we can begin doing right now to be the CHANGE we want to see in the world. I have formulated this in the acrynoymn C.H.A.N.G.E. to make this easier for you to remember. Just 3 of these things will begin to make a great improvement in your life and in the lives of those you encounter.

C- Compliment. Find something every day that you can compliment. A person, an action, or a nice breeze on the summer day is a great start. The more we find things to compliment the less we will complain. I want to take the time to compliment the courage and incredible strength that Trayvon Martin’s family and friends found to not only testify but to sit through the trial re-living and re-hearing the awful events that led to the shooting of a young, un-armed, college-bound African American boy.  I also want to compliment each person who experienced so much anger to the point that they wanted to riot or cause damage due to their frustration over the verdict but chose not to do so.  Stereotypes about a race are NOT facts, but sometimes they may appear to be true by the actions of a few. I compliment each person who has chosen the high road in spite of the lowness of the legal system in Florida.

H- Happiness. Find something to be happy about.  While I am not happy about this verdict, I am happy that Trayvon’s name will live on, and that his unfortunate death raised an awareness in this country that can result in a resolution for African-Americans that are well overdue.  I am happy that no ill deed goes unpunished.  I am happy for the peaceful demonstrations that have gotten nationwide attention, the extra love and prayers that the Martin family have received, and for the foundation that is being formed in Trayvon’s name.  I am happy that I have received more people emailing me that they want to help me work with youth and their parents.  There is always something to be happy about if we look for it. Judicial systems of this country may fail, but I am happy that God never fails.

A-Action. Do something! There’s an old Chinese Proverb that says “Talk doesn’t cook rice.”  I would like to add to it, neither does FB likes.  While having an educated conversation about the issue can do some good, it is most effective when it is followed up by a plan of action. Take action to get involved in your community.  Do something that will benefit the greater good.  Sometimes we get so caught up on our own ambitions “grinding” and trying to outdo others, that all our hard work is in vain.  Do we want to be hamsters running on a platinum and diamond studded hamster wheel going nowhere, or do we want to be on the right path in order to leave a mark in this earth that will benefit us all?

N- No Negativity. Perhaps this is a double negative in itself but this NEEDS to be said.  We are energy. We are all the same energy. No one but you has control over your energy and how you use it. While I like to laugh and joke like the next person, in serious situations I see so much energy wasted laughing, joking and saying negative things about people.  There was no need for so much time, attention, and energy to be spent on making fun of witnesses testifying on Trayvon Martin’s behalf when that same time, attention, and effort could have been spent on praying for the witnesses, the Martin Family, and the outcome of the case. Let's not operate in negativity while trying to attract something positive. This may not be a popular statement but what is popular is not always right.

G- Gratitude. I tell you right now that being grateful brings more things for you to be grateful about. And if you are being grateful you won’t be operating in negativity.  I have read FB statuses of friends who cannot sleep because of the trial and who are fearing for the lives of their own family with a verdict that makes many to believe that a black person’s life is of no value in America.  I understand those feelings. I feel the same way. However, after we mourn this tragic outcome, lets make sure that to ensure change for our people that we focus on gratitude.  Your life is the result of your most dominant thoughts. If all we think about is injustice and how wrong everything is for our people in this world, the more wrong we will get.  We all have something to be thankful for. There are things wrong with America, but I will concentrate on all the things I am grateful for while living in this country. Being in a positive state gives me the power to be a leader, and to go out into my community to help young people and their parents. If I have a defeated, victim mentality, I won’t be able to Change anything. 

E- Expectation. When the verdict was read and released all over the media Saturday evening, I looked to my FB wall for reactions, and I did not see one person who said that they were truly shocked. As I watched the news Saturday night, every person on the discussion panel admitted that they were not surprise, and to be honest I was not in disbelief myself. So why didn’t the majority of America expect a non-guilty verdict? What could we have done differently as a people that could have increased our expectations.  In life, to correctly create change in the world, we must EXPECT it.  It is time to raise our expectations, increase our actions, and become empowered so our voice is not just a voice. We want to become a collective movement in society to get things done and CHANGED!

Thank You, Thank You, Thank You for taking the time to read the words form my heart and I urge you all to get involved in some way, shape, or form, to be the change you want to see in this world. If you would like to help me, Shira Dillon, a high school teacher for over 15 years, author, speaker, and parenting consultant with my latest community project to help young people and their parents all you need to do is email me the words HELP in the subject line at shiradillon@gmail.com and I will keep you informed on how you can help create CHANGE in the world.  

Shira Dillon is a high school teacher in Los Angeles, CA. For over 15 years, Shira has worked with young people and their parents in order to build healthy relationships and help them make productive decisions for their life. Shira Dillon is the author of Sex, Drugs, and Other Elephants: How To Deal With Teenager Issues, an insightful book to help young people reach their highest potential in society while helping adults relate to youth better. This book in now only $4.99 on Amazon Kindle. http://tinyurl.com/ogzkj4b

Ms. Dillon is also the founder of Parents, Teachers, and Teens which is a FB page to help strengthen the relationship between adults and young people. With the outpouring of senseless murders of misinformed adults thinking that an unarmed young person in a threat, now more than ever are parents, teachers, and teens needed to help mend the gap between adults and youth. Help me help others by going to www.facebook.com/ParentsTeachersandTeens. If you have already liked parents, teachers, and teens and want to help more, simply share this blog and you will be one step closer to being the CHANGE you wish to see in the world! Thank You! Thank You! Thank You! 

3 Things You Must Do To Have An Effective Conversation LIFE CLASS Style!

"How Do I Be Transparent?" is one of the questions I hear the most as I teach parents how to better relate to their teenagers as a teacher and parenting consultant.  All of my parents are very open to the notion that in order to connect with their children they need to start a conversation.  They need to not only share how they feel about an issue but they must be willing to allow their child to share how they feel about the issue as well.  Once the child shares how they feel, the parent must be willing to accept what the child is saying as truth. So many times, the parent wants to influence the child's opinion that the child eventually stops sharing their true thoughts and feelings with their parent. (Which is why teens love talking to their friends.)  If a parent is going to use the strategy that Oprah is so effectively doing in her Life Class with the subject of fatherless sons where thousands of viewers were able to begin their own healing process because of the way Oprah and her panel discussed the issue, then you are not going to be able to only have a conversation with your child; you must be transparent and have a purpose for the conversation.

        For a free parenting session click here: Get Your Free Parenting Consultancy Session!

When I talk with teens, I am honest and I share with them at least one story from my past. This story from my past isn't some random story, but I choose the life experience that is most relevant to the situation at hand.  If there is no purpose to your transparency or if the story you select is random and not suited for the situation, you won't be able to get highly effective results.  There are three things that every transparent story should have in order to be a highly effective story that will bring you and your child closer together.

#1. SHOW VULNERABILITY! Teenagers need to see their parents vulnerable at times. It's a temporary moment where you are not the "I know it all parent." You are the parent that feel things emotionally just like your child. I have noticed that this serves as a problem for the mother and the father but in different ways. With the father, they are more likely not to show any vulnerability because of societal pressures to be "The Man." This destroys the intimacy and affection that the chid is looking for. With mothers, it is the exact opposite. Mothers sometimes show too much vulnerability that puts a child in a situation where they hold back on saying the honest things they want and need to say about the situation in hopes to make their mother feel better. It's too much emotion and the opportunity for meaningful conversation towards healing is lost.

#2. ADMIT A MISTAKE!  You do not have to be perfect. It's a lie. We are not perfect. Our children already know it, so we can admit mistakes that we make.  Even if its just a thought of worry, doubt, or admitting that you seriously messed up. Admitting to our children that we made a mistake releases the pressure off them and gives them an environment where they can be honest. No one wants to make a mistake. We all want to be perfect, but when a parent is able to say it's okay, and  here's a situation I was in and I didn't make the best choice, you will be surprise on what that can do for a child.  When sharing a story and being transparent, be certain to include some mistakes you've made either in thought or in deed.

#3. BE ON TOPIC! If we are honest with ourselves, we have a plethora of stories to choose from that we can share with our child, but when there is a problem and we are having a conversation to promote healing in the relationship, the story needs to be carefully selected and put together. The story that you share with your child needs to be directly related to the issue at hand. If the problem with your child has to do with a disconnection between the two of you, then share a time in your life where you disconnected from someone or thought about disconnecting.  If the problem with your child has to do with suspect of drug use, then share a time in your life where you or a close friend used drugs or thought about using drugs without ever asking or accusing them of using drugs.

Depending on the situation and history, your child may not come around during the first transparency session, but having the conversation will certainly plant a seed in solid ground that will begin the healing situation for you and your child.

I found a note yesterday from a student I taught last year.  Although there was no name on the note, I know who wrote the note because of the handwriting.  This young girl lives with her mother and has been homeless with her for a spell.  She writes often in her journal about their relationship and how difficult it is for them to get along. They both say hurtful things to one another and often times she is very disrespectful. Her mom doesn't know what to do with her and no matter what, they seem to get in an argument at least once a day.  The father hears what's going on and naturally wants custody of his daughter, and many people hearing this story would think it's the right thing. But my student wants to improve things with her mom. She wants to be with her mother.  It says so in the letter I found.

You can read a copy of my student's letter at www.facebook.com/ParentsTeachersandTeens and if you haven't liked the FB page be sure to like it and share it with your online friends.

I'm starting a new adventure my friends to help more and more young people have stronger relationships with their parents.  Stay tune to find out how you can be a part of the solution to this much needed issue that thousands of parents and children are facing in society today. There are so many adults with broken relationships with their parents now with the responsibility to have a healthy relationship with their own children. Broken people break people! Hurting people hurt people! I have taken the challenge to bring healing to this problem so that healed people may heal others. Want you join me? To find out how you can help email me at shiradillon@gmail.com and type the word HELP in the subject line.

To get more information on the type of stories to share with your child in order to have your own "Life Class" experience and better relate to your child, grab my new self-help book dedicated to teens and beneficial to adults. Inside you will be able to read numerous transparent stories that show vulnerability, admit mistakes, and are categorize by topic.  Sex, Drugs, and Other Elephants: How To Deal With Teenage Issues takes you step by step through many true stories shared by me and the students I have worked with. It is a perfect example of Life Class in action with helpful tips to bring you towards the conversation you need to have in your own parental relationship.  Go to www.amazon.com/ShiraDillon and get your copy TODAY!

Paris Jackson Suicide Attempt-Being Hospitalized!

June 5, 2013-  CNN and Fox News are amongst the stations reporting that Paris Jackson, the fifteen year old teenage daughter of the late pop singer Michael Jackson is being hospitalized after being found unconscious inside the Jackson's Calabasas home where she lives with her grandmother Katherine Jackson, and her brothers Prince (16) and Blanket (11).  

The entire world watched the Jackson children say goodbye to their father at his funeral which was publicized on television July 7, 2009 to over 31 million viewers and was the second most watched funeral of all time. Saying goodbye to a father due to a premature death would be difficult for any daughter at any age. However, for Paris Jackson, and the rest of the Jackson family, saying goodbye was something that was done in front of a plethora of lights, cameras, and news reporters.  I don't know what kind of help was put into place for the Jackson children after the funeral when the rest of the world went on with work, paying bills, and posting on Facebook about the next big news story, however anyone who suffers the lost of a love one needs to make sure their mind is properly cared for. Yes, the calls, the hugs, and back rubs are all nice physical comforts, but for people, especially young people who have suffered the lost of a love one; they need  mental comfort and treatment as well.  The people affected need to be counseled and educated about the lost of life in a practical way they can understand in order to begin the healing process. I don't know if this was done for Paris Jackson. The 15 year old recently tweeted several cryptic messages on Twitter.  She wrote, "All my troubles seemed so far away now it looks as though they're here to stay." She also tweeted: " I wonder why tears are salty?" Obviously, there are issues still bothering the girl, and 83 year old Katherine Jackson has her hands full raising three kids in a time period she knows little about.

Parents it is crucial that you pay attention and talk to your kids.  Good behavior and good grades in school does not mean that you have a child free of issues.  The teenage years are arguably the most troubling years of a teenager's life.  So while the world reacts to the news of Paris Jackson, who we first got a chance to know during her heartfelt speech at her father's funeral, let's remember that she is a teenager growing up in today's society where the issues of sex, drugs, self-esteem, identity confusion, and loss of a love one are not respecter of persons.  All teenagers, black or white, rich or poor, are battling these issues everyday. According to Paris Jackson's biological mother, Debbie Rowe, the two now have a closer relationship and Rowe admits her daughter's suicide attempt doesn't come as a shock. Paris hasn't been the same since her father's death.

Being a parent is a difficult job, and those who aspire to be great parents have a task that is extremely challenging.  Having the ability to create a life is such an amazing God given gift.  Unfortunately, this gift doesn't come with an instructional manual, or self help book to teach us how to do a great job and how to handle all the numerous challenges that are going to come our way. So the heavy responsibility falls on adults to make sure that as parents we don't just talk at our kids, or talk to our kids, but that we talk with our kids. When we talk with our kids, there's no fear of embarrassment, backlash, or punishment. Talking effectively with our kids is an extremely rigorous task that needs to be taught and practiced regularly in order to eliminate the risk of falling back into the ineffective parenting talk which has produced popular yet damaging cliche's such as "Because I said so." "This is going to hurt me more than it's going to hurt you." and "It's my way or the highway."

As we continue to live in a world divided into "The Haves" and "Have Nots", let us remember that when it comes to teenage issues, being a have or a have not is irrelevant. I think that often times people become desensitize to the problems that takes place amongst those who appear in the limelight.  For those who do not have much money, having millions of dollars and being a celebrity appears to be a dream life.  However, for those who have received those things, they still have to deal with the common universal problems that every person deals with; often times on a greater scale.

- Money cannot stop a teen girl from becoming pregnant,

   it can only pay for an abortion.

-Money cannot stop a drug user from overdosing, 

  it can only pay for rehabilitation.

-Money cannot stop a person from being sick,

  it can only pay for medication to become well.

-Money cannot stop a young person from being sexually abused,

 it can only pay for psychological counseling.

and...

-Money cannot prevent vices that leads to premature death, but it can give you the monetary means to afford greater quantities of the device that can lead to death.  

Here's hoping that the Jackson family get the healing, counseling, and strength they need to overcome one of life's greatest battles...death!

Shira Dillon was born in Gary, Indiana. She holds a Master's Degree in Secondary Education, and a Bachelor's Degree in Speech, Theater, and English Education.  Shira is a SAG/AFTRA actress and comedian that infuses her talents in the entertainment industry, her own childhood experiences of being a teen, and her 15 years of experience in the public school system to help parents and teens all over the country fix their life and relationships.  With the new release of her teen self-help book, Sex, Drugs, and Other Elephants:How To Deal With Teenage Issues, Shira has been highly sought out for parenting/teaching consulting, workshops, and speaking engagements.  To learn more about Shira Dillon or for booking information go to www.shiradillon.blogspot.com