These forces are Love and Fear.
When we operate in love we are operating at our best self.
When we parent in love we are parenting at our best self.
In order for an adult to improve the situations in the home between parent and child one must honestly take time to look within and to evaluate their own parenting styles.
Are you parenting in a force of love or fear?
It is possible to operate in both love and fear but NOT at the same time.
Parents normally shift between love and fear based on the circumstances that are thrown their way.
When children do good things, the essence of a parent's being become flooded with love.
When children misbehave, a parent may engulf a spirit of fear that can result in raised voices, harsh words, and severe punishment in order to show the child the consequences of their poor behavior.
This is how many people have grown up for centuries.
We send out vibrations of love when things are going well and in turn spew out vibrations of fear, anger, and guilt when things are bad.
It's what we have been exposed to as the way to solve problems in the home and to make the child obey.
However, how do you feel when you are operating in fear?
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What emotions are you releasing on yourself, your children, and everyone in your path?
In heated situations, are you allowing love to guide your parenting or have your emotions shifted into fear?
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I want to breakdown 3 approaches to raising children. Two of these approaches have been existing and in heavy practice since the beginning of time. But only one of these approaches keeps the parent and child in the force of love no matter the obstacle that the family may be dealing with.
Read the three types of parenting and determine which one are you?
1. Permissive Parenting- the children are allowed to unfold without the direction of their parents. It is assumed that the child will naturally make the right choices when ready. (i.e., Johnny, whenever you are ready to clean your room, I suppose you'll do it. I'll just let you sit in a dirty room until you figure out you should clean it.)
2. Authoritarian Parenting- is the oldest and most widely-used approach. Parents take charge by using their power and authority to punish their children in order to teach them what to do. (i.e., Johnny, clean up this room now or there will be no television for a week! Do it NOW!)
3. Breakthrough Parenting- the responsibility for solving problems is shared between parent and child. Parents teach by using discipline instead of punishment. Parents use influence instead of control. (i.e., Johnny, your room is a mess, what is your plan for cleaning this room? Tell me the best way for you to clean your room immediately?
When I first began studying Breakthrough Parenting, I couldn't say that I operated as a breakthrough parent. I was not raised by a breakthrough parent. While I liked the shared responsibility between mother and child, I felt that "Clean your room now was just as effective." It wasn't until I began studying and talking to thousands of teens, young adults, and parents that I learned that there is always ways to improve on our parenting methods.
Children who feel that they are being controlled with anger, punishment, and loud outbursts eventually rebel and experience emotional consequences in their adult life.
While these methods may seem to work initially, the method is only temporary.
Oftentimes, when we instill fear in our children to get them to behave, it's equivalent to putting a band-aid on a festering sore.
We need to instill love in our children for long lasting results while teaching them how to become responsible members of society.
My goal for my own children and the 500 plus students I teach each year as a high school English and Theater Teacher is for every child to develop self-mastery.
Self-Mastery is the power to control one's actions, impulses, and emotions.
Are you a self-mastered person?
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Breakthrough Parenting with love is a great way to learn self-mastery and to turn any parenting struggles into cooperation.
If anything you've read has sparked an interest, please feel free to email me at shiradillon@gmail.com
Email the word CLASS if you are interested in a FREE class to learn more about Breakthrough Parenting.
People spend countless number of dollars and time in education and training for their careers.
How much time and training have you spent on the career of being a parent?
Join me for a free online video class about Breakthrough Parenting.
In it you will learn...
-Effective discipline in a way that promotes willing cooperation from your children
-How to communicate so that everyone listens and understands
-Resolve conflicts quickly and easily with win/win methods
- .......and much much more!
You can enroll in the online video class of Breakthrough Parenting w/ Shira by doing any of the following....
1. Email the word FREE to shiradillon@gmail.com
2. Follow Shira on facebook at https://www.facebook.com/Mz.ShiraNicole
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